“Because of TAFES I have changed what I am looking for in marriage.” One of the staff said this to me one evening when he was over for dinner. Intriguing! I asked him, how have you changed? This guy hasn’t lived in his tribal context for most of his life, […]
I was at a Christian seminar on parenting with Tanzanian peers. The facilitator made the argument that your first priority must be God your spouse your children and only after that, your career or money or anything else. This stuff makes sense to me. I am in a highly companionate […]
One of the TAFES staff asked for advice on Whatsapp from senior associates about a student’s question: Is married people having one bank account good or not so good? We ask for your view and experiences. What ensued was a fascinating discussion of husband and wife’s roles in marriage, that […]
There’s stacks to unpack from the list of good and bad husbands and wives that a Tanzanian friend posted in a whatsapp group recently. I will only make two observations here, one about the husband list and one about the wife list. Husbands: economic care must include the emotional My […]
The other day a Tanzanian friend shared over a whatsapp group qualifications of a good husband or a good wife. Each one began with a list and explanation of lesser types of husbands and wives. Today I provide summary translation of the qualifications of husbands and wives. In the next […]
Tanzanians draw their gender roles and distinctions in all kinds of different places to us in Australia. They call themselves a patriarchal society, but women have freedom in places where they don’t in the west. So when our friend Isaac got married to Jema on the weekend, there was no […]
“The first year of marriage is really hard,” we heard over and over again in the lead up to our wedding, so I set my expectations low and braced myself for conflict. Would it be about how to squeeze the toothpaste and the cleanliness of the house, or would it be over […]
